Samson, My Samson

By Natalie

Today I miss you.

Most days I miss you.

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The sweet dog smell that I loved to take in for the first time in my life. I miss our cuddles. I miss how you laid behind me while I cooked. I miss how happy you would get when we’d come home. I miss your sweet low groans when you’d get excited about something.

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I loved watching you play. I loved rescuing you. I loved giving you a home. I loved the feeling of attachment I had with you. But it made it so much harder. I can’t explain to you the traumatizing emotions I felt when I had to see you in the shelter after you were taken away. Dozens of dogs barked constantly around you. Volunteers screaming behind closed doors. And there you sat in your own filth because who has the time to take out a dog who’s on death row? I want to forget the nightmare. I want to ignore that they never gave you the toys I left. I want to forget how you whined in confusion while you watched me walk away.

But I never want to forget the last time I held you. In that small little room, just the three of us, and with tears in my eyes I tried my best to apologize to you.

I am so sorry my Samson. Sorry I couldn’t give you a better life. Sorry the opinions of people hold so much value. But thanks sweet boy, for being such a joy to me while I had you. For teaching Brandon and I to grow closer together through it all. For showing us who true friends are. And simply for being the light in my life that you were.

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What’s on the Grill?

By Natalie

I’ve talked about the magic of the grill before. If you don’t have one, I’m telling you, you need one! Our grill has saved us from so many hungry disputes. I don’t know about you, but when I’m hungry, I’m not happy. And the grill puts food in our bellies quickly. Get outside! Let your man grill for you. Who can pass up, a man who’s happy to cook with his ridiculously large grilling utensils, less for you to prepare, and less dishes. What are you waiting for? It’s fabulous.

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Our Favorite Meals on the Grill

Foil Dinners- Here’s my favorite foil dinner recipe.

Steak- Recently we’ve been purchasing tenderloins fresh from Wegmans, and they’ve been more than perfect. B seasons them with Molasses Bacon, and leaves them on the grill until they’re about medium the way we like them. But of course, any meat thermometer will tell you a safe temp. if you’re worried.

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Burgers and hotdogs- We prepare our own burgers with ground beef mixed with Molasses Bacon seasoning, and a hamburger seasoning. Then form them into patties. Serve with onion, tomato, lettuce, and cheese. Toss on grill until cooked to your liking.

Make your own pizza- We use a ready made dough from Wegmans, and add a little bit of spaghetti sauce to the center. Sprinkle a generous amount of Mozzarella cheese, and add whatever toppings you’d like from there. We’ve done Pepperoni, sausage, basil, & tomato. Toss on the grill for about 5 min, until the cheese has melted.

Beef Shish Kabobs- We’ve prepared our own shish kabobs with sliced beef or chicken and veggies. But we’ve also grilled the already prepared ones from Wegmans and they’re delicious.

Cedar Plank Salmon- Seasoned with garlic salt, olive oil, and meat magic seasoning. B has been grilling these on cedar planks which can be found in most grocery stores near the grilling materials.

Our Favorite Veggies on the Grill

Asparagus-I actually didn’t even like asparagus, until I tried it grilled. Prepare with light olive oil and salt.

Corn with Husk- Pull husks down. Rinse corn. Sprinkle with salt. Pull husks back up. Toss onto grill for about 10 minutes.

Peppers & Onions- We’ve grilled these while on shish kabobs.

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Your pup is sure to beg for some smokey goodness.

B’s Favorite Seasonings

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DIY: Sewing Jar

By Natalie

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Here’s what you’ll need…

  • Mason Jar
  • Fabric
  • Hot Glue Gun
  • Scissors
  • Fluff
  • Things to decorate the outside such as card stock stickers (Optional)

Step One: Cut out a circle of fabric that measures about twice as large as your lid. Extra fabric can be cut if necessary. You don’t want to be left with too little fabric. Step Two: Place a ball of fluff on your fabric, and press the mason jar lid to it. Use a little more than you would think necessary. You want a fluffy top. photo 3

Step Three: Squeeze hot glue onto the rubber part of the lid, and press fabric onto the hot glue. If you feel like you need to add more fluff this is your last chance. When there’s a small opening like the picture shown below you can stuff more fluff in before you seal the circle.

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Step Four: Place lid on top of mason jar and screw the second lid over it. Because of the hot glue and the fabric the lid will not screw on all the way down, but it should still be able to close.

Step Five. Add any decorative things you’d like on the outside. Place push pins in the top, and any sewing materials you’d like on the bottom. Such as bobbins, buttons, pins, measuring tape, etc.

I made these as gifts for Mother’s Day, So I tossed a long piece of lace and buttons in the jars for looks.

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Enjoy!

 

Weekend in Pictures

By Natalie

Do you ever have those weekends where you finally get a chance to sit Sunday night, and you wonder “What on earth did I do all weekend?” Mondays are not my favorite. I can’t imagine they’d be anyone’s favorite. It’s not so much the going back to work part. I enjoy my job. It’s the leaving the family behind part that I really dread. After a weekend full of love, and events with family I find it difficult to muster up the strength to lock Bingley up in his crate for the day, and drop B off for a similarly long day.

This past weekend was beautiful. It was hot, after all it’s June. Welcome summer. We missed you.

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My weekend started off with a long trail walk next to the Bug. Should I mention he is huge? There was a time when I could pick him up in my arms, to walk the poor little stinker out in the dark in the wee hours of the morning. And then he grew. Faster than my eyes and heart could handle.

Friday

Oh Friday night. How my young heart feels you should be honored as the king of weekend happiness. But my married heart of 3 years remembers… It’s just another night. And we’ve worked all week. We’re kind of tired. And Friday night, we enjoyed you in our dating years. We still do. But these days we seem to enjoy you more in the comfort of our own home. Is that so bad? Enjoying your Friday night freedom in our pjs, watching Netflix, with maybe a bag of popcorn, and a soda.

Saturday

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I headed off to Richmond with the fam for a very important event for all of us…

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The 3rd annual 2014 Lupus Summit. We spent the day becoming more educated on my sister’s illness. The summit included several doctor’s who were so gracious to provide their time to help loved ones better understand this autoimmune disease, and all the treatments that are out there.

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As hard as I tried, and tried, The only family member who was not camera shy was Sean.

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And he was just kind of being a goober. We’re all kind of goobers when we get together. My sister Nadir and I are grown women, and for some reason I find that when we get together for things like this we just seem to get all giggly, and act like children. Something that only a sisterly friendship could consist of.

After the doctors had a chance to speak. We were sent off into breakouts. We attended an informal Lupus Caregivers session where we were able to voice the difficulties we were feeling. I had no idea it would be so relieving to hear that there are other people out there who feel just the same way. And their loved one with lupus is going through all the heartache, pressure, doctor’s appointments, and struggles that my sister Nem is going through. I walked out of that room and when I saw her waiting for us I gave her a hug. Because I’ve been frustrated too. I’ve wanted to do more. And after feeling so much relief from voicing a few thoughts I knew that it was time to just give her a hug, and realize that she’s still my same sister.

And then there was Rita’s…

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That Saturday evening it was hot. When you’re in the car in the sweltering heat, and your husband turns to you and says “Rita’s?” You do not protest. First cherry italian ice of the summer. 2014, I see a good future in you.

DIY: Decorative Gift Bags

By Natalie

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I snagged these medium sized brown bags a few weeks ago, and while they’re perfect in their own little brown paper bag way I felt the need to dress them up. If you’re looking for a simpler more personal look for your gift giving this year this is the perfect project for you.

Here’s what you’ll need…

  • Brown Gift Bags
  • Scrapbooking paper, or Cardstock
  • Adhesive
  • Cardstock Stickers (Optional)

All I did was slice up the paper how I wanted it to fit to the bag. Put a little adhesive on the back, being sure to cover the edges well. Add a Cardstock sticker if you’d like (Or really any little do bobs you might find at the craft store. Like fabric flowers, or buttons.)

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The pink one has part of a book page of course. Cause you know… I love book pages.

Crafting doesn’t have to be difficult, expensive, or time consuming! There you go. Myth Busted! You just have to find the simpler things to get you started. 

Enjoy

The Trouble with Reviews

By Natalie

What is our trouble with unhappy endings? I’m not just talking about the stories that end poorly, I’m talking about the stories with unsatisfying endings. They get to us. And there we are pleading desperately for more closure. I recently stopped by the library downtown to pick up a couple of books. Because books lately have been a healthy food to my mind. I just needed to pick up a few quick reads to get me through the weekend. I finished a book called The Spectacular Now by Tim Tharp, and it was a book that caused me to think. Which is more than I could ask for in an author. The story was kind of tragic really. But the more I think about it the more I attach myself to the story.

The trouble with book reviews and any review for that matter is that everyone has differing opinions. I become frustrated with the people who rate everything 5 stars because not everything is worthy of 5 stars. But I also grow frustrated when I see people rate stories so poorly. There’s just too great of a spectrum. Too many different genres to compare one from the other. You must compare mysteries on the scale of other mysteries. Classics on the scale of other classics. Just because something was a different genre doesn’t necessarily mean that it is worse. Different stories speak to different people.

Let’s unpack this for a second. Reviews should be based on such things as storyline and character development. Intrigue certainly has grounds to be judged, for what good is a story if it does not capture you? Emotion of all things certainly should not have a large role in a review, because we are all innately biased. We are creatures of opinion, with differing morals, and all walks of life. This is why it frustrates me when people rate a story too low simply because they do not agree with the lifestyle of the characters.

Upon finishing The Spectacular Now I felt so empty. Before giving this book a low review I stopped to think… In a way the author did his job. I felt just as empty as the main character of the story. And isn’t that the point? To relate with in some way, to feel what the characters feel? To emerge yourself in the story and be overcome with emotion over the characters. Ok ok you’re about to have an intervention with me. Natalie… too many books. Never. Like I said, reading has been good for the mind. Swirling my imagination in every which direction. Giving me fuel to write myself. It is one of the only things that keeps me writing.

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 And so… I just had to say that not all stories have happy endings. And that’s difficult to accept because we all want happy endings. Hence the reason the movie version of this book just had to take the extra five minutes to provide closure. To give you what you wanted. But is that honest? Is life really full of all happy endings? No. And that’s why I kind of loved this book. The main character Sutter Keely was the most tragic character. In the end he felt he was this certain type of person and he loved this girl, but he wanted what was best for her. And it wasn’t him. As much as you wanted it to be him, you know it wasn’t. But you admire him for doing all he did for her anyway.

This is all just to say that the next time you review something take a second to think about the story. Did you not like it because it was poorly told. Or did you not like it because it didn’t turn out the way you wanted it to?

A Peek Inside the Craft Room

By Natalie

deskThis room is the only reason why I’m able to complete most all of my crafty endeavors. As an avid crocheter, reader, sewer, and all around crafter I longed for a space to house all of my hobbies, as they were quickly growing out of their homes. I had baskets upon baskets of fabric, and paper craft all over our apartment. When we bought our house we quickly realized that I had enough stuff to load up this room, and I adore the way it came together. Above is the desk that B and his dad built for me. They took my design and ran with it.

photo 1This entertainment center was happily discovered by B’s mom at Goodwill years ago, and if I remember correctly it was a steal at $10! It was in good shape to begin with, with just a few scratches. But nothing major enough that a little wood scratch pen, and murphey’s oil couldn’t solve.

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Of course, a quiet spot to read.
 

A few of my favorite pieces

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Anniversary Weekend

By Natalie

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For our anniversary this year we had last minute plans to stay somewhere for a night. However, having our anniversary fall on memorial day weekend is a double edged sword. If we don’t plan well enough in advance every hotel, bed and breakfast, and cabin will be booked. As I was trying to pull something together I told B that I’d like for us to at least do something on Saturday, I suggested a picnic. He suggested we hit the beach. Oh we’ll go with your suggestion then, I thought. “You’d want to do that? Go to the beach for the day?” Oh my wonderful husband who longs to make me happy. “Sure why not.” he said. Isn’t it wonderful when you expect something small, and someone surprises you with something greater?

So I drove myself to Target that Thursday afternoon, and picked up a sand chair for my love, and a little beach umbrella to shade him. Because I knew that I would be able to lay in the sun much longer than he would prefer.

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See. What a nice little seat. All propped up to read his book. He dissapproves of picture taking.. But that’s ok.

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And then he ended up like this. Utilizing this versatile seat as a pillow. This is the part where I convince myself that this was an excellent purchase.

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We don’t go to the beach too often. We’re more cabin in the woods type of people. Getting away from it all you know? Peace, quiet, and campfires. But every now and then when we go to the beach I get really super excited, preparing for the trip the night before. Double check to make sure the his and hers sunsreens are in the beach bag. Cause in our household poor B needs Coppertone SPF 50, and I’m good with Hawaiin Tropic SPF 8. I also find it essential to toss the Aloe in the fridge so it’s nice and cold when we come home. Finally, a chance to use our personalized cooler. A chance to sit back and read my book by the water. A chance to work on my latest crochet project for the car ride. Yes crochet… The way I figure it when I’m a grandma, I’ll be expert level.

When we arrived I couldn’t help but think isn’t the beach lovely?

These days I’ve been rather pensive. Everything I see or do causes a stream of thoughts. My mind strives to take everything in at once. To remember things. To be grateful for the smallest parts of life by capturing them in moments. I sat there for a while soaking in the sunlight, and salty air. Giggling at all those who were attempting to lay their towels flat in the wind, only because Brandon and I had a hard time ourselves. Commanding one another to gain control over that corner as if the wind was not in charge. The sand pushing its way between my toes. Even remembering the feeling of small grains of sand that brushed against my cheeks with the ever advancing sea breeze. It was fabulous. But the best part is, it wasn’t just the beach. I was spending quality time with my husband. Reminicsing on three years of marriage together. Getaways are essential I’ve learned. It doesn’t have to be often. It doesn’t have to be expensive, it doesn’t even have to be that long. Just find something that will be renewing, something to bring you and your loved one closer. Being in each other’s company can either be the best or worst part of a marriage.

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Let’s make it the best.

It’s Here!

By Natalie

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3 years ago today we rang a bell to announce our marriage. 3 years!!

How was I so lucky to be able to marry (pardon the ‘ol cliche here) my best friend? He truly is my best friend. I call him to let him know what I had for lunch and how it was. I talk to him before every decision I make. We laugh together. We have fun with one another. I confide in him with complete vulnerability, and that is something you could only do with the best of friends.

I can’t believe it’s been 3 years already, and I’m sure the years will continue to fly by. Marriage has been the most beautiful blessing in my life, and I’ve grown to be a stronger more compassionate woman because of it.

Happy Anniversary my love. I love you so much more every single day. Thank you for being such a sweet and thoughtful husband. I love sharing my life with you, and I’m so excited for the future we have planned! Here’s to the rest of our lives!

Highway Blues & First Dances

By Natalie

This morning I made a discovery. I was listening to some blues on my way to work. Because it was one of those days. A cloudy morning, and a slow drive in. I like some good blues every now and then, you know.. deep soulful Otis Redding blues. I have to give it up to my brother in law Sean for sharing this wonderful taste in music with me. There I was listening to Redding refer to himself as Mr. Pitiful and I just started thinking. About this and about that, and my mind just began to wander all the way up the highway. Before I knew it I was at work. Those are the most wonderful drives, when you’re lost in your own world. Apparently, blues does that for me.

These Arms of Mine began to play.. the deep strum of the bass pushing its way through the speakers of the car. That’s when I started thinking. This song was runner up number 3 for our first dance. At Last by Etta James was a close second but I knew that song was a no go before I even really considered it. I love the song, but it seemed a little ridiculous to dance to a song stating “At last my love has come along.” when I was only nineteen.. not typically a long time to have to wait for love. And then there was the fact that my sister chose an Etta James song for her first dance.

Don’t tell me you’re thinking what does that matter? Oh, it mattered.. at least, back then it mattered while I was desperately attempting to be unique. When looking at rings I didn’t want the triple diamond because my cousin had that, I didn’t want the cushion setting because my sister had that. I liked my oldest sister’s ring but I wanted princess cut. Poor Brandon, I must have made his head spin. When looking at dresses I didn’t want one that looked like any bride’s dress I knew of in the past 3 years. “Why don’t you get married here like so and so?” Someone asked. “Is that a joke?” I thought. “I don’t want to hold a wedding that everyone just attended.” Mortified, I moved to the next subject. Getting married can make you a bit… crazy and.. selfish.. entitled even. Something to do with being the center of attention. There I said it. I was so concerned about doing something different from everyone else, that now I wonder if I made decisions according to what I actually wanted.

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I loved my wedding day don’t get me wrong. I just think I could have saved myself, and everyone else for that matter, alot of run around. In the end we decided to dance to “Can’t Help Falling in Love with You” Ingrid Michaelson’s version. It suited us perfectly, with the way we fell in love, and being young newlyweds. Not to mention it’s always been one of my favorites. All these thoughts ran through my head this morning. As I was merging onto my exit pondering first dance songs I confessed to myself that the first dance was the most awkward moment of my wedding day. I really don’t think that goes for everyone, especially the couples who practice. The only time I’ve ever danced with B was high school homecoming. I figured on our wedding it would just come to us. Now, I don’t think we looked awkward or anything. It’s just that the song seemed to last forever, and everyone stares at you. I mean when do couples have a chance to dance these days? Legitimate dancing, not the twirls we do randomly in the kitchen during dinner prep. Not often enough it seems. Am I alone on this?

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