Archive of ‘My Dearest’ category

Cruise Control

By Natalie

Ana popped by Sunday and we went on a walk. Is everything ok? She asked. Because I told you to hang back. We’d all been under the weather and I wanted you to rest, since you let me sleep in that morning. But I was confused by her question. I didn’t think much of telling you to stay behind and as I explained to her that we were better off taking shifts during family illness I got to thinking about the stage of life we are in. A stage of life where thank goodness we’ve developed a long-haul kind of love and we can simply cruise along. One that can sustain us through somewhat unromantic times like these. So I wrote you this love letter about how we choose each other every day and what that honestly looks like.

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A Slow December

By Natalie

Our family has chosen to celebrate this festive season by slowing down. A few weeks ago I sat down to discuss our Holiday plans with Brandon. “What Christmas activities do you want to do this year?” I asked. I went rambling on about how I didn’t think we needed to drive through the Charlotte Motor Speedway Lights again, but maybe we wanted to try the light show in Ballantyne this year. And should I plan to take Felicity to Gingerbread lane again the gingerbread house competition nearby and a number of other events in our area. There’s so many things to do this time of year in Charlotte. There’s almost too much. In one sense it’s nice because not one event is crazy crowded. But at the same time it feels like you’re missing out on something.

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Margins

By Natalie

Years ago Brandon and I heard a sermon on margin. Margin in a nutshell is leaving space and time in your life and schedule, to prevent overwhelm. Margin for us over the years has grown into more than leaving time in our schedule, it’s having margin in our finances for those in need and in our case space in our home as well. This margin we had created was exactly why we could say yes to inviting Zoe into our home. Margin is key so you have time to breathe, you’re on time and so you have enough energy left for your family. It has allowed us to say yes to people in need and it’s something we’ve always tried to incorporate in our lives. Since Felicity started kindergarten I’ve juggled, balanced, scheduled, whatever you want to call the way that I try to manage our lives all while keeping margin. Not having a 9-5 job means that I have the flexibility to do what I want with my schedule, yet I’ve been finding myself trying to fit a whole load of things into my schedule. I’ve realized that I need to sit and revisit my margin for this season of life.

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On Our Ninth

By Natalie

We’re celebrating nine years of marriage today! Our anniversary looks a tad different this year as it has for most during this time but we are still smitten! We grabbed coffee this morning with Lici. She pointed to our cups and said, “Coffees?”. Then we blew some bubbles, chased her around and walked until we found some dog pictures on the side of a pet store. Which our little animal lover found very exciting. (more…)

Caring for a Spouse with Anxiety

By Natalie

In the spring of 2016 Brandon came home not himself. I was busy with something that day not quite paying attention to the worry he’d brought home with him. Like an extra backpack he carried a weight he attempted to describe to me. But as I said I was busy, flustered by my own agenda I brushed off his concern. I wish I could go back to the Natalie in that moment to place my hands on her shoulders and say, “Stop what you’re doing, he needs you right now.” I wish I could have told myself to look in his eyes to recognize the defeat he felt and held him in that moment to tell him it was all going to be ok. But like all regrets in life we can’t change our actions, we can only allow them to teach us to be present in every moment. You’ll never know how big of a deal some conversations can be.  (more…)

On His First Father’s Day

By Natalie

On Brandon’s first father’s day weekend he spent his entire Saturday building this beauty of a baby gate. Seems appropriate. It sort of happened by coincidence. We were struggling to find a decent gate for our stairwell so as most things go when we can’t find exactly what we’re looking for, Brandon decided to build one. I found a similar mock up here and Brandon agreed to make it! It also sort of flows well with the banister on our front steps. (more…)

A Valentine’s Day Confession

By Natalie

Happy Valentine’s Day everyone ♥

Valentine’s day is a day for us two girls to flaunt our puff sleeves and fill the house with pink.

We don’t usually do anything extra special on Valentine’s day. Brandon makes us dinner. Sometimes I make us dessert. I say I don’t need to have flowers but I secretly always do want them. Sometimes I feel sheepish when people say they don’t really give gifts to eachother for Christmas or don’t really celebrate Valentine’s day. Confession! I really love holidays. I like Valentine’s day. I love all of the balloons and heart shaped things in the stores. I like seeing flowers on Valentine’s day. (more…)

Motherhood Right Now

By Natalie

This morning I watched the pink morning light peeking through our window fade to orange. Felicity lay in her cradle arms up bent at the elbows.  She’s sound asleep.

I can’t stop looking at her. I can’t put her down even though I know I need rest too. And for the life of me I can not stop this bucket of tears from pouring down my cheeks.

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Home Sweet Home

By Natalie

Hunting for a house this spring was as exciting as it was frustrating. I searched tirelessly sifting through photo after photo of houses in our area until they all blurred together. Offers were accepted on several houses that had been listed that same day. They were flying off this competitive market as quickly as they came on. Our realtor Lisa was kept busy adjusting our viewing schedule by the hour as homeowners accepted offers before we had a chance to see their home. Lisa was honest, quick on her feet, encouraging through the disappointments and excited for the potential we saw in our new home.  (more…)

New Beginnings

By Natalie

I’m officially no longer a nanny. Which makes me all sorts of emotional because that means I’m becoming a mother myself. Like many of the things in our lives we did not get here by accident. Nearly seven years ago Brandon promised me that one day I would live out my dream of staying home to raise our children.

At the time it was difficult to believe. Coming from a past of empty promises I was nervous about trusting his. Marriage takes a ton of trust and I was just beginning to practice it. Now I can tell you that he’s never made me a promise he couldn’t keep and while that may seem crazy it’s really not. Brandon is a logical guy if you don’t know him. He never made me a promise he couldn’t keep. As frustrated as that would make me sometimes when there was something I wanted I eventually learned that Brandon had our best interests and long term goals in mind all along. He made those tough decisions to say not right now which I now realize has been him leading us well all along. Seeing his promises come to fruition over the years has made it unbelievably easy to walk alongside him and trust him 100 percent.

I feel so overwhelmed by this time in our lives that we’ve prepared for. I feel incredibly blessed to have this time to rest, love on my husband in our final days as a family of two and to prepare for our daughter.

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