Homeownership, & Growing Up

By Natalie

Sometimes, sadly, I find that I don’t have too much to talk about. I have a million and one drafts of things that I wish to share, but for some reason today, I just don’t know what to talk to you about. You know I’ve been bit by the reading bug again. You know about the Lupus walk we did recently. You know quite a bit about me now don’t you? But today, what shall I share with you? hmm. Perhaps that we bought a new ac unit? Hurray for home ownership! Our nasty 24 year old beat up ac unit was screaming desperately to be put out of its misery. And come to find out it actually had put itself out of its misery in the dead of this past winter. We only realized because as the sun began to warm the interior of the house these past couple weeks the house grew hotter and hotter. FInally we realized that the poor little thing wasn’t even running outside. Just puttering in some sort of air through the vents somehow.

And so, we young homeowners bit that horibble bullet and bought ourselves a new ac unit. Oh but it is grand. No really. It’s about twice the size of our old one. Making it quite a bit more efficient. After it was installed B and I ran outside to inspect it. Bingley sniffed around it, and I wrapped my arms around that unit and hugged it. “We might as well get excited about it you know. It’s brand new! We didn’t pay all that money not to get excited about it.” I said to Brandon, and he raised his eyebrows, and laughed.

It’s funny. The things you get excited about when you get older. I think the first time I realized I really grew up was the black friday that Brandon came home, and surprised me with a new vacuum cleaner. Never would you know that the smile I produced in that moment was due to a new vacuum cleaner. I opened the box as quick as I could, and began to vacuum our whole apartment. Every Nook and Cranny..

And then just recently we got this carpet spot cleaner. Where you can spray water, and cleaner and scrub, and suck it all up through this hose. It’s amazing! I got on my hands and knees, and cleaned the whole carpet in our bedroom I was so excited.

Can you believe that you just listened to me ramble on about that silly stuff? I know. You think I’m a clean freak… I kind of am. Something to do with being in control of my life I think. But who knows, that’s a different story for another day.

Happy Day. And don’t be ashamed of getting excited over the silly, or small stuff. I sure am not.


Of Sunshine & Good Writing

By Natalie

I went outside today to read for about an hour because it’s one of those lazy Sundays that the sun decides to grace us with its blinding presence so I figured I’d take advantage. I’ve recently finished a book, and I find that when I finish a book, I need to quickly jump on another because if not I won’t read for too long. And reading… it’s marvelous. There is nothing quite like the feeling of becoming completely entranced in a story, as all that’s around you begins to blur. For some reason I have an MO of not finishing books, and I really dislike that about myself. However, for some reason whenever I am reading a book that I can discuss with someone I am much more motivated to continue. Some of the best books I’ve read were the ones that my sister and I read alongside one another. And so, I thought why not start a small little book club. Because yes, I’m not your average twenty two year old, and I find excitement in the thought of a book club.

Graciously, some friends were equally excited as I was about the idea. So we kicked off our book club a few days ago, with a short and simple read. The Fault in Our Stars by John Green. And I’m in love with it. I know, I know, you think I’m in love with alot of things, but I am. I love it when I find myself reading a sentence over and over again because I just can’t get enough of it. Each word dripping with symbolism, and creativity. I do love a good writer who captures my heart, and shares their story so eloquently.

photo (4)Having a perfect day to match a perfect read is beyond compare. I laid out in the backyard with my book basking in the sunlight with the rest of the day ahead of me to read on. Finally, I looked up from the pages of the book my mind still lingering on the last words of an exquisite sentence. Off to my left a certain little (Well not so little anymore) pup meandered his way over to me. Dogs always seem further than they actually are, and then all at once they just hit you with their tremendous weight, and drool. I was gifted with the sloppiest of puppy kisses I’ve ever known. I decided to finally step back inside as I was in need of wiping off said kiss much to Bingley’s confusion, and when I did step in from the cloud of heat I found that I had become a much browner version of myself. And B looked on in amazement.

I do so love when the weather is nice enough to read outside.. I do so love the way the sun chooses me to goldenly darken.. I do so love puppy kisses.. I do so love sharing my day with you..

Firsts: Last 5, Next 5

By Natalie

Today is one of those rainy days that causes me to lack inspiration. I could totally give into it today too. Allowing this downpour to symbolize all of the things that lack flow in my life. But perhaps you stopped by today expecting a pick me up, because the rain has given you unnecessary cabin fever in the spring. And so, I figured that maybe today I’d keep my rainy day woes to myself, and speak on the subject of something quite contrary. Here’s a list of happier things while we sit in silent anticipation to see our bright and cheery sun again. (more…)

Caught in the Act

By Natalie

I did it everyone! I finally caught the insanity that is piling groceries on one arm. photo 1

This is a phenomenon that I have only recently learned about through being married. I talked about this phenomenon a bit here.

Apologies for my blurry photos. I stopped inside to drop off a couple bags, and walked back outside to find the incredible Brandon and his bionic arm, and of course, I just had to quickly snap the husband at work.

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As you can see, he did not approve of the photo taking. Hence his running away.

Your welcome for the laugh. Happy Monday!

Lupus Walk

By Natalie

imageWe did it. We walked for the second time as a family in D.C. to raise Lupus Awareness. The morning of the walk we drove to the metro station which I will have to excitedly admit is one of my favorite things on earth. I know. Kind of lame right? I need to get out more. It’s the only type of railway vehichle I’ve ever been on, and I’m facsinated by it. Just you wait until you get me on a real train… I won’t be able to contain my excitement.

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Once our family had all arrived and corralled together we began our mile and a half walk toward the Capitol. That’s it. Such a simple act to show support, and turn some heads on the busy street. The Grand Marshall of our event this year just so happened to be Nick Cannon. Kind of random? Not at all. Cannon was diagnosed with Lupus in 2012, and he’s made it his mission to raise awareness, as he too is still learning more about the disease. He cut the ribbon with oversized purple scissors, and we were off. Sent as a sea of purple consuming the streets of D.C.

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Nothing makes me happier than doing something out of the ordinary with my Saturday. So you can imagine I’d been looking forward to this event for quite some time. Not only did I enjoy every bit of this day, but for the first time in a long time I was able to see my big sister smile. And it wasn’t just any old smile. If I could describe it in a word I would descibe it as a smile of relief. Relief to be surrounded by so many people who understood what she’s going through.

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That doesn’t mean that she magically felt a million times better, because she didn’t. I’d love to say that the walk was just what she needed. To get out, spend time with all of us, and be carefree. But it wasn’t. The reality of her disease is that no matter how hard she tries to ignore it, no matter how many people try to help, no matter how happy she is, her body is the one who eventually gets the last say, echoing in her mind “I’m done, I’m hurting.” Her joints ache with every movement. Her muscles cry out in fatigue, and weakness.

That afternoon the three of us girls went to a Nationals game with our husbands. Feeling perfectly content snapping photos, and giggling with Nadir, I thought surely Nem is feeling great. All I’ve seen her do is smile, but then I glanced over and noticed the slightest wince in her face as she was trying desperately to overcome her discomfort. I quickly remembered noticing the same face a few days before Christmas when the three of us girls went to see the Nutcracker ballet. She furrowed her brow next to me. She fidgeted in her seat. She was silent on the way home. And I remember thinking to myself “Why can’t you just be better? Why can’t I make you laugh? Why must an illness take over your physical body like it does? You are the big sister. You’re the one who’s supposed to tell me everything’s going to be ok.”

But she is such a fighter.

If I have 100 questions for her body she must have 10,000. Through hearing her descriptions of her symptoms I’m not so sure I could do it myself. I’m certain I would curl up in bed, and never leave my home. The fact that she is even able to get up most mornings is a wonder to me. I wanted the Lupus Walk to be the push she needed. I wanted it to help her. But all it could have ever done was make her happy inside, and feel the slightest bit of relief. Every day for her will be a new day with it’s own set of challenges, and flares.

I know you visited today dear reader with the expectation of sunshine and daisies. To be honest I thought that day would be perfect too. And while we had a good time together, there is no denying the fact that Lupus remains an ever existent disease. Thank you so much for reading. Thank you so much for sharing. Thank you for your support in helping me raise awareness. When did people start believing that they are of no use to world change, peace, or disease? You may not be the most intelligable, nor are you much of a speaker, but do you know that it all begins with you? Awareness begins with the smallest of us crying out to the world for a change. After all, I’m just a baby sister praying for a cure.

Little Boys & Legos

By Natalie

It’s not a coincidence that I work in pediatrics. My mom has always been in the school or social system. One of my sisters is an elementary school teacher, and my other sister is a children’s pastor. There’s something in our blood that aids us in connecting with children. Who doesn’t want to listen to kids chattering on about nonsense? And build lego towers with them, or make everything out to be super exaggerated? Or maybe that’s just me. You never know what to expect from their little minds.

I loved passing out Goldfish to tiny preschoolers in Kid’s Church. I loved being a nanny, and watching princess movies with 3 little girls. I love discovering all the new versions of Connect Four with the kiddos at work. I love watching sweet girls that somehow know just what to do with baby dolls. They cradle them, and feed them as if they were their very own. It’s a mystery to me. And the boys, they are even more of a mystery to me. I am fascinated by their ability to build structures from a few simple blocks. I attempt to give my hot wheels cars a vroom sound, but it is nothing in comparison to the dozens of different sound effects little boys are able to concoct.

One day I was watching my two little nephews. We sat on the living room floor in the midst of wooden train tracks leading to nowhere. Toy cars, planes, and lego pieces scattered along the rug. I picked up a green lego and began doing what I typically revert to when it comes to legos. Build a house. Find that square flat green piece, and build yourself a house upon it. Do you think the thought to build a house even crossed my nephew’s mind? Maybe, but the thought to construct a plane was much greater at the moment.. While I was busy swiveling the front door to my lego house he was jumping all about, plane in hand creating sounds I can’t even begin to mimic. “That’s a nice plane.” I said. “Aunt Natalie it’s a biplane. Because It has this piece on top.” He pointed to the top wing I guess you could call it. “Well then, I stand corrected. A biplane.” I had no idea. The next time we drove by small Shannon Airport I excitedly pointed to the plane narrowing in on it’s runway. “That was a biplane.” I told B. “What? How do you know that?” he asked suspiciously. “Our 4 year old little nephew taught me that!” B nodded his head in assurance that little boys know their planes.

biplane

What Bingley Has Taught Me

By Natalie

Whoever said a dog couldn’t be a girl’s best friend?

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I can tell you now that there is nothing like having a dog as a companion. Having Bingley means I’m never home alone. It means that sometimes when it’s just the two of us in the house and I feel the need to think aloud I’m not actually crazy because Bingley will listen. Having someone that depends on you does something to a person. Dogs think you’re awesome, always. No matter if you had a crummy day, or feel down and out. They’ll sit by you when you’re sad, and stare lovingly at you. Wishing to be more helpful, but all they know to do is scootch closer to you outstretching their paws. Truth is, that just having them around when we’re sad makes us feel a million times better.

On my day off when I need a break from house work Bingley leads me outside. He looks at me excitedly when I put his harness and leash on. “Really mama?! We’re going on a walk? You’re the best!” Then he parades around the neighborhood proudly showing off his owner. He takes a short nap when we get back, and when I need fresh air once more he gladly hops up to sit outside with me. Baby boy loves his backyard. If I thought he loved the snow he loves the spring even more. So many new scents popping up for his precious little nose to take in. He has taught me to stop for a moment to notice even the smallest bits of creation that pass through our backyard. He marvels at the birds chirping, he tries desperately to catch butterflies, and bumble bees, as he’s amazed at all their flying glory.

Owning a dog has proven to me that I’m not all so bad. If I’m anything like most people, I’m my own worst critic. If anyone were to put an end to me with their harsh words or thoughts it would be myself. If I’ve done something wrong I can’t let it go, and have the hardest time accepting forgiveness. Whenever I feel that way, and just wish to wallow in my misery silently beating myself up Bingley will lay next to me. He’ll look up with those puppy eyes thinking “You’re not all so bad mama. I love you.” And sometimes every now and then we all need to hear that. Even if it’s through the silent stares of our dog’s eyes.

People say don’t get too close to your dog. Your dog isn’t a human. You are not a mother. And yes, that’s true, but not bonding with your little pup is next to impossible. When something is dependant on you, and you watch it grow it’s impossible to not worry about them when they’re sick, or care for them with everything inside you. So this one’s for my Bingley bug, and all those dog owners out there who are brave enough to let a little wet nose into their heart..

5 Reasons to Prove I’m a Grownup Kid

By Natalie

  1. I love everything Disney. I held onto my old disney VHS tapes for the longest time. B convinced me to get rid of all of them, and said that one day I could get the dvds. But come on, once your married and paying a mortgage it’s not so easy to reestablish your disney collection. You have to do things like buy new fridges, and get your chimney swept.
  2. I use tissues with lotion when I have a stuffy nose. Ok that’s normal. Most people do… but do most adults get boogie wipes for themselves? The last time I was sick I begged Brandon not to laugh at me for getting boogie wipes. For those who are not parents, Boogie Wipes are basically a baby wipe for kid noses. They’re soothing, and made with natural saline! Let’s be honest, even the tissues with lotion can chap the stuffiest nose. Now that you’re curious about them yourself here’s a link to relief.
  3. Every time I go to Chick-fil-a I get a 6 count nuggets kids meal, and trade my toy for an ice cream cone.
  4. I always beg Brandon to make me a chocolate milkshake at night. Just to give you an idea of how bad of a habit this is for me, there was one night recently that I even waltzed over to the bed and sat down sipping on my milkshake. I looked over at B. “Well?” I said. “What?” He said confused. “Aren’t you going to thank me for making my own milkshake tonight?” B laughed. “Now I need to thank you for making your own milkshake?!” And then I realized he was right, I was being a bit ridiculous. I know my sisters must be shaking their heads while they read this. As they were the ones who once succumbed to my requests. Except my middle sister Nadir. Nem, the oldest, always spoiled me because I was the baby. Whenever I call her she still greets me by saying “Hi baby.” And I kind of smile a bit, because I am the baby. When Nem and I went to Europe in 2006 I was not a fan of the food. If I ended up with something I didn’t like, and I thought hers was better she’d trade with me without hesitation. Nadir however, she was sure to keep the spoiling to a minimum. I’d stare at her with her bag of pretzels that she always seemed to be munching on. When she noticed I was interested she would look me right in the eyes, and straight faced she’d finish eating, and close the bag up greedily proving her point. She also had this spinning toy that she kept on a shelf, and I was never aloud to play with it. I would beg her to try the contraption, but she always refused. She never used it, or did anything with the toy. It was almost like she kept it around just to taunt me. I’m curious if she even remembers it. That all makes her sound pretty mean, but as you could assume if it weren’t for her my expectations of people would be way too high. I’d never do anything for myself, and I’d always expect to get whatever I want. Who knew siblings could teach you such valuable lessons?
  5. I begged my mom for a puppy when I was a kid. I begged my husband for a puppy when we got married. When we finally did get a puppy Brandon got up in the middle of the night to take him out every time. I maybe got up less than ten times during those 2-3 months. B still gets up early to let Bingley out, and feed him. I like to say that I take care of all the playing and cuddling time with Bingleybug. My mom knew what she was doing. She knew me, and she knew I would have a tough time caring for an animal, so she stuck me with beta fish, and kitty cats. And I will say, she did warn Brandon.

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When Pollen Attacks

By Natalie

To all of you who suffer during allergy season, fear not. You’re not alone. I write to you urgently in between sneezes. I never suffered from allergies, until a couple years ago. Oh what a wonderful 20 years that was. Enjoying the Spring air with no worry of pollen count. My nose is runny, and red. My throat feels tender. My face hurts. Everything in my head feels itchy. I can hear fluid enter my ears while I blow my nose. My coworkers stare, silently telling me that they will not bless me after the third sneeze in a row. I carry around pocket hand sanitzer, as they are convinced I’m a germ cloud. I pick B up from work, tell him about my day, and he chuckles at my congested nasally voice. Personal tissues with Lotion sit at my desk at work. Honey and tea now sit with my regular sandwich in my lunchbox. (more…)

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